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Alexander's Rock

I may not have the skill to write this without a preamble that outlines my intent. This is not a story about the death of my grandson, Alexander. I will write about him another time.

This is not a sad story but a joyous one. It is about the generosity of people. A generosity of such overwhelming proportion that it lifted up a family at a time of unimaginable grief. It's about community at its best.

You expect families and friends to come together for support at a time of loss. Perhaps especially when that loss involves a five month old baby, suddenly dead due to a previously unsuspected heart condition.

What you don't expect, or at least we didn't, is the generosity of acquaintances. You don't expect acquaintances to be so moved that they had to do something, even where there was nothing that could be done.

It takes time for acquaintances to even hear the news. Alexander's death, although a profound and horribly life changing event for all of us, was unimportant in the grand scheme of things and not the stuff of modern news coverage.

So people on the edge of our lives only learned the news by word of mouth days and even weeks after the funeral, long after donations to the Trans Canada Trail had been received and forwarded. Most of these people didn't know Alexander. Some hadn't known he'd been born. But they all knew my daughter and had watched her grow from girl to adult. They were touched and wanted to do something, something tangible.

So we spoke to my daughter and she suggested they plant a tree in Alexander's name. So when people asked, that is what we told them. And when more people asked and when more people asked. And when our dentist asked, and our dry cleaner, and our neighbours, we asked them to plant a trees in his memory.

Trees were planted in Australia, in the United States, in Great Britain, in Sweden, in Israel and in many, many parts of Canada.

In May of that horrible year, the staff at Linda's school planted a sugar maple tree, in his memory, in their habitat garden at the front of the school. They also ordered a large granite rock and had the words, "Alexander's Tree" carved on it.

In talking with my daughter last year about how she survived such a devastating loss, she told me it was because everyone everywhere had done everything right. Even in her loss, she had never felt more supported.

Heather is now the mother of two more children, Natasha and Griffin. Her sister Kathy is expecting a daughter in September.

Alexnder's Tree Staff
Posted by Anexplorer at 6:26 AM - 18 Comments   Add a Comment  
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Comments:

What a lasting tribute ANex...




Gloria
 
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by gjwlegs (PM , CC ) on Monday June 23, 2008 @ 8:04 AM




Exp:

What a nice jesture in memory of little Alexander...a Sugar Maple!...POP'
 
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by lalepop' (PM , CC ) on Monday June 23, 2008 @ 8:25 AM




Thanks Gloria,

And, in case you were wondering, that is Linda sitting on the rock in the bottom photo, surrounded by the staff of her school.
 
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by Anexplorer (PM , CC ) on Monday June 23, 2008 @ 8:54 AM




One of my favorites pop.

Thanks.
 
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by Anexplorer (PM , CC ) on Monday June 23, 2008 @ 8:55 AM




That was so sweet! And having such support after experiencing a loss is wonderful lift. When my father passed away from lung cancer two years ago, I got my strength and desire to live again from supportive friends and family members.  
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by DotstheOne (PM , CC ) on Monday June 23, 2008 @ 9:41 AM




What a beautiful tribute

love sugar maples by the way - esp. in fall when they turn red and orange and yellow

cheers

ron
 
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by AZRON (PM , CC ) on Monday June 23, 2008 @ 9:47 AM




Hi Dots,

Support is critically important during times of loss. I'm glad people were there for you, as they were for us.
 
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by Anexplorer (PM , CC ) on Monday June 23, 2008 @ 10:12 AM




It's grown into quite a beautiful tree over the last 8 years Ron.  
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by Anexplorer (PM , CC ) on Monday June 23, 2008 @ 10:14 AM




People can be so supportive during such hard times Anexplorer,
It also shows their response to people that are loved. When you give and embrace your community, the reward is outstanding.
 
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by Whispered Promise (PM , CC ) on Monday June 23, 2008 @ 11:05 AM




People were very supportive, Whispered, and their kindness will never be forgotten.  
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by Anexplorer (PM , CC ) on Monday June 23, 2008 @ 1:42 PM




A beautifully moving post, explorer.  
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by Randy (PM , CC ) on Wednesday June 25, 2008 @ 6:40 AM




Thank you Randy.

It would seem that even a very little life, if it touches the hearts of people, can leave this world a better place.
 
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by Anexplorer (PM , CC ) on Wednesday June 25, 2008 @ 6:57 AM




Anex, this story about Alexander is lovely. It gave me a lump in my throat and teary eyes.  
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by Bohemian (PM , CC ) on Wednesday June 25, 2008 @ 11:43 AM




What a lovely living tribute to a little boy, who did not have a chance to plant his own roots, except in your hearts.

Luv ya,
n.
 
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by n. lynn (PM , CC ) on Thursday June 26, 2008 @ 11:59 AM




Anexplorer,
To do a thing that brings life si the most anyone can do
in times of tragedy. I lost a dear firend on June 9. he
was successful, and out-going, a ton of laughs. We didn't
know that inside of him was a stone of sadness. He went
out onto a county road, took his revolver, and blasted one
shot into his heart. The grief was terrible, but the grief
he must have known, and the fact that none of us saw it,
brings us to our knees. This post gives me the notion that
I should do something that makes life happen, in his name.
Thanks for the post Anexplorer, grief sometimes creates a
greater good. You are blessed,
Joe
 
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by joesblog6 (PM , CC ) on Thursday June 26, 2008 @ 1:36 PM




Thank you for your comments, Bohemian. They were much appreciated.  
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by Anexplorer (PM , CC ) on Thursday June 26, 2008 @ 7:53 PM




That was beautifully said n. Lynn.

I never quite thought of Alexander that way, but now it will be the only way I think of him.
 
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by Anexplorer (PM , CC ) on Thursday June 26, 2008 @ 7:57 PM




Hopefully it does Joe. At least I would like to think so.

Thank you.
 
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by Anexplorer (PM , CC ) on Thursday June 26, 2008 @ 7:59 PM


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

   
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