Oprah Winfrey politely fights to keep a straight face as Anexplorer and his wolf enter the great hall of her mansion. She looks from the "View From The Bluffs" blog on her laptop back to the man and wolf advancing toward her in sheer disbelief.

"Oh this is just too precious," she says, beginning to giggle. "Those are real buckskins, aren't they?"

"It was all Tall Pocket's idea," Anexplorer complains. "He thought I should look like the icon on my blog."

"And is that an English Springer Spaniel in a wolf's costume? Tell me it isn't"

Lindsay whines pitifully and shakes, the mask slipping sideways on her head. For a moment she looks unnervingly like a dog with two heads. Anexplorer looks embarrassed and begins removing the costume from the obviously uncomfortable animal. "My dog Lindsay," he explains. "I got the idea from one of Dalpha's blogs. She posted all these pictures of dogs dressed up in these costumes...."

"Well, Mr. Anexplorer," Oprah interrupts, still smiling. "That was quite the entrance. My secretary tells me you write this blog" She looked down at the image on her computer. "And this Tall Pockets person thought it would make a good book."

"I told him it was a stupid idea."

"Actually, I thought you said, 'Find me a publisher and I'll take her money with a smile.'"

"Well, that's kind of the same thing."

"And didn't he also say you were a few chapters short of a book."

"Well, yes. But that's not what he meant."

"MMmmm." muses Oprah unconvinced. "So tell me a little about your blog."

"Well I tell little anecdotes about my life and talk about taking Lindsay for runs along the top of the bluffs."

"And have you done something interesting with your life, Anexplorer. Are you, perhaps, a famous person back in Canada."

"Well no."

"Have you invented something the world should know about."

"Inventing really isn't my thing."

"You call yourself an explorer, have you explored interesting and dangerous places?"

"My mother almost dropped me in the middle of the Atlantic ocean when I was three."

Oprah looks up from the story on her laptop. "And since you were three."

"I've been on vacation in Florida a few times."

Oprah looks hopeful, "Where in Florida?"

"Disney World."

"So your pitching the concept of a book about someone who has done nothing interesting with his life and spends his time walking his dog back and forth along the bluffs."

Lindsay pauses as well, waiting for his answer. "Basically. That's about it."

"Well, I'll have to review your blog with my staff and we'll let you know if we're interested in the concept."

"Really?"

"No, I'm just being gracious and letting you down easy. This is as stupid an idea as I've heard in a long time." The Oprah's face turns to one of suspicion, "This isn't one of George Clooney's practical jokes, is it?"

Anexplorer's shoulders slump and he turns to go.

"And those buckskins would fit better if you lost about twenty pounds."

"So my doctor keeps telling me."

"I know a good diet plan," she calls after him.

Five minutes later, Oprah is on the verge of recovering from the experience when her secretary enters a second time.

"Tell me that Anexplorer hasn't returned?"

"Oh no madam. But it is another person from blogstream. Her name is Bella and she wants to talk to you about another blogger named Fairweather."

"And is this Bella in buckskins, too?"

"Oh no madam, actually what she's wearing is body paint."

And that is when Oprah reaches for the phone and places a call to Dr. Phil.